It seems fitting that as I'm writing this we're experiencing an actual shift in seasons. The weather in Michigan is finally breaking, and we're faced with a glimpse into what's to come - so many things are on the verge of being something different. Some of them we literally see and experience, while others are a feeling or a sense of what's around the bend.
My personal seasons are shifting too, in a new and exciting way. I made some big goals for this year, and had ZERO idea how I was going to accomplish most of them. Then lo and behold, a fork in the road of life appeared and suddenly I'm faced with choosing. I can either choose something that I'm super familiar with, that I love, that I'm comfortable in OR I can choose the new and unknown by leveraging a resource and opportunity that's been under my nose the whole time.
If you follow me on social media, you're probably familiar with my love for what I affectionately refer to as #Soulshine. I love natural light. It's one of my nonnegotiables. I HAVE to have it in my life, or I "wilt". I also love my home, which is a huge source of where I take in my Soulshine. It's a space that feeds my soul and at the same time perfectly reflects who I am as a person. What am I equally obsessed with? Growth, living my purpose, and stepping into the unknown and uncertain spaces and opportunities that continue to challenge me in those areas.
So what's the big, looming choice? I'm selling my home. A month ago the thought of doing this had never even crossed my mind. But there are certain times in life, when you've done the work to be intentional about who you are and what you're working towards that you can't escape an "answer" when it hits your radar. And this is one of those times. For more reasons than most will ever know, this space has served me. It's a representation of family, of memories, of second chances, of love gained, and love lost, of stability, of comfort, of pleasure, of friendship, of purpose, of feeding my soul. So why would I give that up?
When you say yes to something you say no to something else. I said yes to selling my home, in all its beautiful wonderment and glory, to say no to stagnation, to say no to fear, to say no to limited possibilities. I can stay here, in this space, but I would be suffocating the growth and opportunity that sits on the other side, the growth that I very purposefully aimed for when I set my goals for the year. I continually choose to take up my space, and live my purpose - which means a boatload of personal accountability. And I've made it a habit (one that serves me well) to continually pursue the very scary things that my heart, mind, and soul KNOW are for me. This is one of those things.
Now don't get me wrong, this is not an easy thing for me. In fact it's been incredibly emotional at times. I knew when I made the decision that my heavier emotions would come in waves. What I also knew was that I would have the support that I needed to weather those emotions AND that I could also look forward to the positive, exciting emotions that come with this transition. Because of the work I've done to shift from a place of scarcity, I'm able to look at this and utilize it as a means to propel me into the next level. That next level is *scary as shit*, but what's scarier is knowing I could grow and choosing to ignore that. Doing that would reinforce the little voice in my head that says, "Stay here - it's safe. What if you fail? What if you sell your house, lose all of your money, and find yourself with nothing?"
I KNOW better. Every time I gamble on myself, I win. Period. Whether I win a lesson, or win with accomplishment, it's still a win. My actions keep getting better, my strategies smarter, my intuition stronger, my goals bigger. It's been a journey getting to a space with myself to be able to lean into the fear while pushing into the beauty of the unknown. But the lessons that are currently coming from that journey are FOR me, and I wouldn't trade them for the world.
So, what are the lessons that I'm learning right now - in the midst of selling my home, while also shifting into that next level? I'm glad you asked.
Lesson #1 - First and foremost, when you're headed into *heavy emotion* territory, a side of effect of life-changing decisions, do NOT isolate yourself. Like I said above, I have an amazing support system. What I didn't say was at the same time I decided to list my home (and make all the small improvements needed to get it ready) my boyfriend, ahem - "My Rock", was out of town on vacation. "Go ahead", I said. "I'll be fine", I said. Silly me. The complete meltdown resulting in all the tears and the ugly crying face in the Menards parking lot after picking up projects supplies was "my sign". This was too big a thing to, too emotional a thing to navigate alone. I still had support, the most magical, just when I need it connections, texts, and calls. But I allowed myself to be home alone too much, in my head and thoughts too much, while I was making life altering decisions and grieving the loss of my home (Yes, I generally grieve the loss of something BEFORE it's gone, not after - but that's a whole nother topic).
Lesson #2 - The big, scary decisions are easier to make when you have a solid understanding of who you are, what you need, and what your goals are. In coaching, a HUGE part of what I talk about is building your foundation - Core Values, Emotional Goals, and the Design of Your Future Best Self. My core values are Integrity, Growth, and Accountability. My emotional goal (which can change from time to time) is generally joy. And my future best self - well, that's a lot to put here. 😉 My personal accountability and future best self are the two biggest factors in my decision to leverage my home to pursue my goals. Once something's on my radar, because I'm solid on who I am and what I want, I can't ignore doing the thing to get there.
Lesson #3 - Our awareness of opportunity is constantly evolving..... if we let it. After I decided to pursue entrepreneurship I had to learn a million different things on the fly. One of those things was learning to recognize opportunity. I consider myself lucky for never having been in a space where conforming was the name of the game, where I "had to" acquiesce to fit in or survive. My creative applications to almost everything also apply to opportunity. How I *thought* opportunity looked before has quickly and beautifully evolved into a million different things. And that same creativity has allowed me to recognize unique ways to approach or accomplish something. This is key to navigating life. Our perspective, our understanding is constantly shifting. If we're "zoomed out" trying to look at too big a picture and focusing on too many things, there's a lot of blur and disconnection. When we can "zoom in" while also incorporating those goals and values, we can narrow in and focus on what's important, one thing, one moment, one solution, one step at a time. It's not about figuring everything out. It's about choosing to start HERE (wherever that is) and building something from there while staying focused on the end goal NOT on how to get to the end goal.
Lesson #4 - Finding evidence of..... I've proven several things to myself, and continue to. There are a few things in particular, that I've learned about myself, that give me comfort and security in making this huge decision. It's human nature for our minds to create our reality based on the past, and the stories my past are bringing to the table for this season are the fuel to my fire. First, I can do hard things. I've done them before, and I'll keep doing them. Something being hard doesn't deter me, it inspires me. Second, I always create a home, wherever I go. I LOVE my house. Looking back at every space I've lived in, I can recognize that I always create a beautiful, welcoming, soul-filling space, and this next space will be no different. Thirdly, I'm finally at a point in my life where I'm choosing intentionally before a decision is being forced on me. I *GET* to sell my house to create bigger opportunity and get even closer to my dreams I've set for myself. I can't even begin to explain to you how huge this last piece is. To have the awareness and intention instead of being stuck in survival mode...... it's everything. This proves how much I've grown over the last 10 years, and I look forward to continuing that growth.
So, what nuggets of wisdom would I share to sum this all up? You're going to face some scary decisions in life. When you've gotten to a place where you can trust in your path, identify opportunities (no matter how unconventional), and do it whether you're scared or not - THAT is life changing. And that is exactly what I help others do, one decision at a time.